带你深度剖析雅思写作范文

仙子之梦

　　很多同学在备考雅思作文的时候，常感到无从下手。听力阅读可以做题，口语怎么说还有个题库，但作文，总不能背范文吧！

　　其实，虽然我们不能直接拿范文来用，但考官的小心思和喜好，可都是赤果果的展示在范文中呢~

　　今天，我们就以一篇考官范文为例，带你深度剖析，雅思作文的高分之道。更多雅思写作的相关信息也可关注一下北京新东方的雅思课程。

　　选自剑桥雅思真题集C8 - T1

　　Somepeople think that parents should teach children how to begood members of society.Others， however， believe that school is the place to learn this.

　　Discussboth these views and give your own opinion.

　　首先进入到文章的开头段：

　　A child’s education has never been about learning information and basicskills only.(1) It has always included teaching the next generation how to begood members of society.(2)Therefore， this cannot bethe responsibility of the parents alone. (3)

　　我们可以看到，本段虽然无生词：但文章中第一句话用“never”及“only”， 最后一句用“not”及“alone”， 考官都运用了双重否定表肯定， 从而增强句子语气。

　　同时第二句中的the next generation 也符合less common vocabulary。 增加了词语表达的丰富性。

　　接下来我们进入到文章的主体段1：

　　In orderto be a good member of any society the individual must respect and obey therules of their community and share their values.(1) Educating children tounderstand the need to obey rules and respect others always begins in the homeand is widely thought to be the responsibility of parents.(2) They willcertainly be the first to help children learn what is important in life， how they are expected to behave and what role they will play intheir world. (3)

　　首先来看句1和句2， 运用了特殊开头词的写作形式：“in order to ”(介词短语放句首)及“Educating”(动名词放句首)。

　　大部分童鞋写句子时， 名词代词放句首的偏多， 特殊开头词引出句子的方法，可以尝试 ~

　　再来看句子中的respect and obey 这组， 及what...how... and what 这组，两组都属于平行结构， 一组是短语平行， 一组是从句平行。 三个从句写出来， 不仅句子长度拉长， 同时还展示了书写从句能力！

　　最后来看句子2的谓语，共有两个， 分别为begin 及 be widely thought ，一主动一被动， 这又何尝不是增加句子灵活度的方式？

　　然后是文章的主体段2：

　　However， learning to understand and share the value system of a wholesociety cannot be achieved just in the home.(1) Once a child goes to school， they are entering a wider communitywhere teachers and peers willhave just as much influence as their parents do at home. (2)At school， children will experience working and living with people from awhole variety of backgrounds from the wider society. (3)This experience shouldteach them how to co-operate with each other and how to contribute to the lifeof their community. (4)

　　句1，一方面双重否定表肯定了 not 及just用法，同时还起到了承上启下的作用，起到对学校教育的论述。

　　句2， once及where引导两个从句做嵌套， 句子虽长， 但论述逻辑清晰。 段落的句尾再次出现平行结构，也是为了和上段做呼应。

　　But to bea valuable member of any community is not like learning a simple skill. It issomething that an individual goes on learning throughout life and it is theresponsibility of every member of a society to take responsibility for helping theyounger generation to become active and ablemembers of that society.

　　最后的结尾段， 往往要给出观点及看法， 这里我们看到考官在给观点时用到了这样一个短语“active and able”。大部分人看到后没有任何感觉， 但他实际用的是押头韵的用法。

　　和其相似的还有，Beauty and the Beast， League of Legend 以及 Pride and Prejudice等等。只要留心， 这种在电影及杂志上的材料，不妨细心积累，放入你的作文库中。

　　这就是C8T1的范文，对大部分人来说， 这篇材料是没有生词的。 但考官就是用了双重否定表肯定、特殊开头词、平行结构及押头韵等等表达了多样的句式！

　　所以我们看出， 真正好的作文不是生词长句， 像考官材料一样，用简单词表达多样的句式，也同样能帮你拿到作文高分哦！